Day 217: Not worth it

Not worth it!

So, I've made a deal with myself that, if she doesn't keep her promise of writing me a birthday card or celebrate for my birthday, I'll delete her permanently. Apparently, she only wished a happy birthday at 11+ pm, though she saw my snap story of me posting my birthday cake in the early afternoon. I'm deeply saddened by this, because I have a gut feeling that I'm all along, nothing compared to her other friends. I'm probably just a temporary guy to replace in China, like how Wei Jian and Ela have like some kind of affair in China? I'm honestly expecting something more than just a " happy bday " snap. Given for all the things I've given you and none that I have received from you, I guess it isn't fair from my point of view. I guess I should have delete you even way before, because I've done a survey and practically you send snaps to your friends at least 100 of them, and there was once you've sent 40 snaps just in the morning till 12 pm. But yet, you're replies to my snap are always 10 hours and more and some even take 24 hours. Given that evidence, I can say that I'm not even worth to be part of that 100 snaps you sent to all your friends.

Live your "luxurious" life with Aaron, that little bitch must have still be texting you and snapchatting you all day and all night long. Given his wealth, no doubt people will stick to him until you know how stingy he is with his money. Apparently, my existence to you is nothing but just words coming out of your mouth. You changed me, in a better way, making me kind, decent as well as giving me the power to strive for what I want, but what you didn't realised that it is YOU that I want to have...

Lets not even talk about me loving you just because I want to have sex with you. I always feel at home, just having you beside me. Remember when I was doing my creo2 drawings of the gearbox which Aaron didn't provide for the team? I bet you can't remember it, because I remember that Eunice and Christel automatically sat beside Aaron but you came up chose a seat beside me instead. I felt blessed and like I can continue with another hour or two with that tedious project. The scent of your shampoo and perfume are already registered in my head and I tend to look around whenever I smell them especially in places we had been together before... So, I hope it wouldn't be anymore than just a "Good bye".